Have you ever met a Narcissist? Of course you have. We work with them. They infiltrate our circles of friends. They are rampant in our families. They may even be… us. What?! “I could not possibly be a Narcissist! I put everyone before myself all the time!” A-ha! I have news for you: you’re a Narcissist. Lemme ‘splain…
I recently had major surgery; I kept this from my Mother (with whom I am not speaking–– post for another time) and only had my sister-in-law with me at the hospital. Dad, brothers, and a handful of friends knew. What was supposed to be “routine” turned into anything but. At one point during surgery, I hemorrhaged, lost more than half my blood volume, and was close to death. Thankfully, I had a Dream Team of doctors, and for quite some time, my sister-in-law was the only one in communication with the rest of the family:
Situation during surgery. Not good. Massive hemorrhage. No word from docs yet. Get here.
No one came.
One “couldn’t deal with this right now,” another “couldn’t leave work.” I was not upset by the responses, as I have been that person a few times. I was, however, very surprised by them.
We think we’re needed so badly at work that our bosses couldn’t possibly understand that a family member is fighting for their life and it’s time to put family first. Or, worse, we don’t even consider that statement as an option, and instead feel that we are just too damn important to leave. Seriously?
When our priorities have shifted in such a manner that being at work is more important than being with a family member or friend in a time of desperate need, it’s time to take a good hard look at the Narcissist in the mirror and ask, “Who the Hell are you right now?!”
We are important. We are needed. We also need to be more aware of how we prioritize our perceived importance and how it impacts the lives of those close to us. Putting our own Narcissism aside to be considerate of and strength for others is a good thing.
Do you really want to be the person who says I should have been there?